Vext (and Yet, Impresst)

I don’t hold grudges, I just have a good memory.

In a bitterly contested Scrabble® game three years ago, my computer opponent played “vext” and the computer judge didn’t peep.  Until then I had never even thought of such a variant. Since then I have been unable to think of much else: The incident is etcht on my memory.

If this were a serious language blog, I might now list the 40 irregular verbs whose past tense can (or must) end in “t” rather than “ed.” I might alert you to the difference, in British English at least, between their spelling when used as verbs and when used as past participles.

But I am not such a learnt person. I just think and wonder, wonder and think, what our world would be like without these little oddities.

I don’t want to exaggerate. After all, people would not have been shooted in the streets over this, even in times passed. But would we have builded so well or spended our time so wisely, do you think? At first I feeled warmly that it was so, but now I have losed that loving feeling.

Then I thought of all the children who goed to school, sended there by their parents. Would these children have understood what their teachers meaned? Would they have leaved school wiser or just older? And just as importantly, when they creeped in this petty pace from day to day, would it have been joyfully or resignedly?

Big questions. Serious questions. If life had dealed me the job of managing the language, would I have made changes? Would I have lended my support to another so tasked? I can’t say; my brain is rended asunder trying to decide, even though I sleeped on it for many nights.

Life continues to surprise: I certainly never dreamt that being beaten by vext would make me feel so blest.

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