What do English cucumbers and French baguettes have in common, besides a certain Continental flair? They don’t fit well in standard grocery-store bags, that’s what.
Let’s take the cucumbers first. In my mind’s eye–and now in yours–two are being held uncertainly by an unfortunate clerk even now regretting the life decisions that have led him to this point. It’s too late for that, buddy: You’re up. What are you going to do?
Lay ’em flat? Nope: They’re too long to lie on the bottom of a bag, plastic or otherwise. Stand ’em up? Nope: They can’t stand upright without all-round support, which is rarely provided by the items on my shopping list and never provided by a soft-sided grocery bag. Stuff ’em in somehow? Well, that’s the default, but they stick out between the handles, making the whole bag unstable and prone to tipping its contents onto the floor of the back seat. I speak from some experience.
Baguette-bagging suffers from the same spatial and balance challenges, with the added insult that the baguette is likely to be broken or flattened in transit. The only thing sadder than a bent baguette is a crushed one.
If these were higher-value items, surely someone would have devised an appropriate package for them by this time. Something long, narrow, and shallow to fit the profile. Something sturdy enough to protect against bruising and breakage. Something sealable to prevent spillage in the back seat.
Hey. We’re talking about a box. A light cardboard box. Is this really beyond our capacity for innovation? We already have boxes for doughnuts, hardly the highest-value item in the bakery. Would it be such a stretch to adapt them to different products? I’m sure we could find uses for the Cuke-Baguette Box™ beyond cucumbers and baguettes. Many other grocery-store items would benefit from a corral-and-protect protocol. Tomatoes. Peaches. Singleton roses. Doughnuts and cupcakes? Yes! Two Feet of Treats. I can see the promotional signage now.
I’m going to go talk to that clerk, if’n he hasn’t already quit. I think I can help him win the award for Employee Suggestion of the Year. What a comeback that would be.
Good luck with that!
Tom
Tom – I know, but if you don’t start you for sure can’t get there.
Well, in Alberta you bring your OWN bag, and a baguette bag would be a quick sew?would you like me to whip one up for you??
Alison – 🙂 Good point. We bring our own bags in Ontario, too, but the standard bags are useless for non-standard items. I have a fold-down box that I use a lot and it’s great for all things rectangular – cukes and baguettes not so much. I’ll take your kind offer under advisement – thanks!
Isabel – how about doing as the Europeans do? Put your baguette in a brown paper bag that covers the bottom half of the baguette, and then put the baguette under your arm, or in a re-usable loose-weave cotton bag, brown bag end down, along with your cucumbers in any way that the cucumbers fit in the bag along with the baguette in its brown paper bag.
Maybe it is just that Europeans don’t sweat small stuff like how to get baguettes and cucumbers home from the market. They also occasionally wash their loose-weave cotton bags, or so I’m told.
John – That method (according to the movies I’ve watched) works well when you’re walking home along a charming street. I guess I could try that (minus the charming street) and get my step-count up at the same time.
BTW – I have also seen Europeans using open mesh bags to carry home their veggies, baguettes and cheese.
Mesh bags are strong but tiny when scrunched, so they’re easy to carry in a purse or knapsack. A good idea for those walkers!
Costco provides boxes, if you ask for one. All kinds and sizes of boxes stored under the counter for customers to use. I’m sure they’re leftovers from the shipments that have come in to Costco, but Costco has the common sense to try to re-use some of those boxes rather than simply throw them into a recycling bin, or worse, into the trash. Supermarkets must also have a surplus of incoming boxes. Why couldn’t they use some of them at checkouts?
Jim T – Indeed, the Costco boxes (often fruit boxes that are low but long, and without tops) would be good for oddly shaped items. The only other store I see offering boxes routinely is the liquor store. It could be a space consideration or an aesthetic one.
I eat buns.
Barbara – 🙂 And Persian cucumbers?